Touching Base and Drilling Down into Annoying Management Speak

Hello all,

Jenny here again.  Snap Fashion has had a great week, had some very exciting meetings, met our fellow Red Bull Stars and finally met Mobile Bob!

The Young Apprentice is back, so it’s the time of year when we begin to hear some fantastic buzzwords.  Frankly it scares me how driven these young people are – it seems like they’ve watched too much of the normal Apprentice: the girls are power dressing to the max and looking over 30, and the boys are rivalling Stuart Baggs “the brand”.

As well as running Snap Fashion, I’m a project manager.  This may be why I grimace so much when I watch the Apprentice, and also why I kick myself when I accidentally use the word “bandwidth” or “offline” in a context that is to do with people, not technology.  Here’s my list of the buzzwords that really rub me up the wrong way – what are yours?

Bandwidth – “Do they have the bandwidth for that?”  What happened to the days when we just asked if someone was busy?

In terms of – Some people slip this one into every second sentence.  In terms of annoyance, it’s rather high.

Going forward – Going forward, I’m going to ban this phrase.  Like, seriously.  We’re not having a meeting to discuss how to drive things backwards so stop stating the obvious!

Let’s take it offline – /* shudder */  For some reason this just sounds 10 times ruder and more ominous than just saying “I’ll chat to you about it later”.

Let’s touch base – And while we touch base we’ll discuss how to drive things forwards in terms of productivity.  Because we’re business people.

Thinking outside the box – I really need someone to tell me to think outside the box when I’m thinking of ideas.  Without these helpful, helpful words it would naturally constrain all of my thoughts.  Thank goodness you were there.

Hit the ground running – I’m not even going to justify this one.

Taking ownership – I have only ever, ever heard this phrase when something has gone horribly wrong.  It’s like being in the boardroom.